Matt's Muzings
Defensiveness
To help you think, ponder and reflect on the human side of leadership
February, 2007 Volume 9, Issue 74
It has taken me about 15 years to gather my thoughts on my latest message. To be honest, I get a new message about every 5 to 10 years whether I want to or not. There are lots of smaller ideas, but core messages come pretty slow to me.
I finally stepped out and spoke recently on what I have been struggling with since I started my Ph.D. research and what I believe is a foundational aspect of life that has one of the most destructive elements in leadership for all time.
Defensiveness
Let me first say that the ability to defend our self is a key part of being made in the image of God. It is a gift from God to enable us to protect ourselves from evil. However: Gen. 3:10 (Adam after he and Eve sinned) said, “I heard the sound of You (God) in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid myself.”
Adam’s first response when sin entered the world was to use this precious gift against the one who gave it to him. He and Eve covered themselves with fig leaves and then hid from God.
The pattern is still with us today. Anytime we feel vulnerable, embarrassed or threatened, our most instinctive response, one that is socialized into us from childhood, as natural to us as the air we breathe, is to hide. To be clearer, to hide is to become defensive to protect ourselves from being vulnerable.
What keeps me from a vulnerable, intimate, in a fully ‘exposed’ relationship with God? Simply put it is my defensive choices. That is it in essence.
I have started rereading Genesis with this in mind and I start to see it everywhere.
Cain killed Abel. He was jealous of being exposed by his brother and instead of dealing with the issue he killed his brother to defend himself before God.
Abram is afraid of those in power and twice gives his wife (she was a key part of his destiny) away in order to defend himself from his own supposed death.
Jacob tricked his brother and father for the inheritance and blessing. Rather than trust God and be vulnerable, he used his gift to get what he knew was in the heart of God for him in his own defensive way.
It is the essence of politics and power plays, the blunt instrument behind control and manipulation and the final aspect of sin that if unbroken will suffocate us unto death.
How do we image out God in a defensive world? Not by being defensive, God made that clear. We are called to die, to lay down our lives, to overcome by not loving our lives unto death.
Leaders must model this. I am sorry to have to say it, as I know the cost, but the way up is down. We are to love, to be vulnerable to those who will hurt us. We can’t do this on our own. Our only hope is the Holy Spirit. Pray with me for a greater indwelling capacity to let him live as I learn to die to my defensiveness.
May God richly bless you,
Matt & Celia
Family Matters:
Matt: I had a wonderful time of ministry in the APC in Switzerland. We spend two weeks on this area of defensiveness and how it destroys our communication. It was a powerful time and exhausting. I also had some really good time with friends and miss them when I am gone. I am working on a workshop with Landa Cope in Malaysia next month. Why don’t you pray about coming? Check out the web sight for it at: www.templateinstitute.com. (Under upcoming events)
Celia: It is good to be back in Singapore and to celebrate the Chinese New Year. It is a very important event in this part of the world. It is family time, reconnecting time and eating time. I had great meetings both with the Children at Risk network and with the Executive team of Connexity in Burtigny. I will go to Bali in March to visit some homes and participate in a Mercy ministry seminar for Indonesia along with Janna and Eva. Thanks for your thoughts and prayers.
Josh: He is working hard and has been on the same house for the last month. It is rather boring so I don’t know what else to say.