Matt's Muzings
A Leader and His Heart
March, 2006 Volume 8, Issue 63
Continuing on……
I continue to think about a leader and his heart. My thoughts find me musing on Saul and his leadership. I find I am a little bit too similar to him in some areas than I want to admit.
We find the story of Saul in 1 Samuel 9. Saul is chosen to be the leader by God. Samuel tells Saul he is God’s choice and how God will show it to him in a miraculous way. It then says, (1 Sam 10:9) “Then it happened when he (Saul) turned his back to leave Samuel, God changed his heart; and all those signs came about on that day.”
I marvel at this. God did a miracle right on the spot and gave Saul a new heart. He then encouraged him with signs and wonders. Wow, not a bad start. I like that and it gives me hope. But then I read on.
Saul heads home and his uncle is the first one he meets. (1 Sam 10:15-16) “And Saul's uncle said, "Please tell me what Samuel said to you." Here is Saul’s chance to tell of his new change of heart. His uncle senses something and wants to know about it, what does Saul do?
“So Saul said to his uncle, "He told us plainly that the donkeys had been found." But he did not tell him about the matter of the kingdom which Samuel had mentioned.”
The Beginning of the end…
I believe it is the beginning of the end for Saul. The amazing thing is that Saul changed his heart back to what it was. I believe he saw the look in his uncle’s eyes. We are the least family of the smallest tribe. Saul wouldn’t face the pain of his family and couldn’t tell them of God’s work. He knew they wouldn’t believe him.
God can change a heart, but it is our responsibility to ‘keep’ it. What does that mean?
I think in one sense it means that we must ‘watch over it’. We must grow it up or as CS Lewis said, we must feed it the right food. The only food it can survive on is God. To put it in a New Testament language, He is the bread of life. If we don’t eat (partake) of him we will die. We will starve to death, as there is no nutrition outside of Him. To continue the metaphor, hell is existing but cut off from the only source of food in the universe for all time.
We can see from the moment Saul wouldn’t live out of this changed heart, it is a downward slide as he becomes more and more malnourished and thus consumed with insecurity and the fear of man overwhelms him.
Malnourished heart
He is a leader with a malnourished heart that is starving to death and yet lives on. I know there is a Saul inside of me. My heart is deceitful and proud and if left to it’s own, it would rather be malnourished than admit dependence on God for nourishment. That part of me must die, over and over if I am to truly nourish the new heart that God has given me.
Join me in declaring my desperate need for God to give me nourishment so that my heart might grow up and I could be a leader that expresses the heart of God.
May God Richly bless you,
Matt
===================================
If this monthly Muzing is helpful, please forward it to friends and family. If you're not yet a subscriber, email mrawlins@mac.com and ask to subscribe. Because all staff members are responsible for raising their own salary, your financial donations are welcomed. Tax-deductible support designated for the Rawlins work may be made out to University of the Nations, and sent to Matt Rawlins, 75-5851 Kuakini Hwy. #2, Kailua-Kona, HI 96740. You can also give online at our web site now at: http://www.ywamconnect.com/sites/MattRawlins
Your prayers are greatly appreciated.